:Joke Time:

share kau ng jokes... hehe...

"If others can,

then I'm not others..."

wahaha..korni.. XD

◘A lonely frog asks a psychic what his future holds.

psychic: You will meet a girl who will hold you so tight and will want to know everything about you..

frog: (excited) that's great..!!!Will I meet her in a party?

psychic: NO...

You will meet her in her biology class....
mwahahahaha.!

...dapat ihihiwalay ko to ng post pero dito na lang...

A Sad Story

merong family na may nanay tatay 2 yrs. old na anak na lalake at baby...

si 2 yrs. old na boy nagseselos na kay baby kasi lagi na lang si baby ang pinapa-breastfeed ng nanay..

so 1 day binalak niyang lagyan ng poison ang nipples ng kanyang ina para wala ng problema..

so ginawa niya ang plano nang tulog na ang buong pamilya..

kinabukasan nabalitaang PATAY NA ANG TATAY...

malalaki na tayo kaya naiintindihan na natin to..

○○█ !bARRA █○○ wrote:◘haha. kakatawa jOwk mO Aiks.!

Kriminal 1: Pare, sigurado ka bang dito dadaan yung papatayin natin?

Kriminal 2: Oo, nagtataka nga ako, 1 oras na tayo dito wala parin siya!

Kriminal 1: Sana naman wlang nangyaring masama sa kanya.

adik!! XD XD XD kriminal b tlaga yan?! XD



XD chorba... ang korni.. XD

If i were a boy.. then i'm a gay..
wala lang XD

Pauper - Iho, palimos naman.
Student - Ibibili nyo lang po ng sigarilyo.
Pauper - Hindi ako naninigarilyo...
Student - Siguro ibibili nyo po ng alak.
Pauper - Hindi rin ako lasenggo...
Student - Naku, malamang ibibili nyo ng droga!
Pauper - Talagang wala akong bisyo...
Student - Ganun po ba? Sumama kayo sa bahay.
Pauper - Bakit?
Student - Ipapakita ko kay Inay kung anung mangyayari
sa taong walang bisyo!)

chuchu..

sa isang beauty contest... may isang dambuhalang girl ang sumali...

Host: "Can I ask what's your vital statistic?"

Candidate: "Ano number mo?"

Host: "Bakit?"

Candidate: "Text ko na lang sau. Dali..."

XD Chorba...

other version:

Host: "Can I ask what's your vital statistic?"

Candidate: "I'm sorry, my statistic is not vital. thank you"

echos! XD

"Pag binato ka ng bato, umilag ka.."

10 QUOTABLE QUOTES:
better late than pregnant.
pag may tyaga, gud luck!
aanhin pa ang damo, kabayo ba ako?
pag binati ka ng bato, kawawa ka naman.
its better to give, much better to receive.
cleanliness is next to godliness. Oiliness is next to blemishes.
ang taong naglalakad na matulin, pawisin.
pagkahaba-haba ng prusisyon, mauubusan din ng kandila.
honesty…is such a lonely word.

ayokong ibigay sa iba ang puso..

dahil..

mamatay ako, literally, duh!








korni...

wala akong alam na joke...e2 nalang


Doc: For your health take only a cup of rice, lean meat and a saucer of kangkong. Fruits for dessert and lots of juice….

Guy: Doc, shall I take them before or after meals?

Reporter: Ano na po balak niyo sa mga homeless?

Guy: Marami, kaso may problema

Reporter: Ano problema?

Guy: Hirap hanapin, walang address eh!

toinkz..

***********************************************************************************
Nagtalo ang mga hudyo at instik kung sino ang nauna sa mundo.
Hudyo: kami, dahil kami ang nagpaku kay Hesus sa krus!
Instik: aber, saan hardware kayo bili pako?
***********************************************************************************
Promoter: Misis, kapag pinaghalo ang breeze at tide, bubula kaya?
Misis: aba syempre!
Promoter: Mali!
Misis: Bakit naman?
Promoter: Dahil walang tubig.
***********************************************************************************
Nun riding a taxi.
Driver: I’d like to ask a favor if I may, sister. I have always fantasized kissing a nun.
Nun: OK. But first u have to be a catholic. Second, u hav 2 b single.
Driver: I am both catholic and single.
<>
Driver: thank you sister. But I must admit I lied 2 u. I am married and a muslim.
Nun: That’s OK. Im on my way to a costume party and my real name is Allan.
***********************************************************************************

^^^haha!! chuchu..

[FM]No. 4 Pencil wrote:***********************************************************************************
Nagtalo ang mga hudyo at instik kung sino ang nauna sa mundo.
Hudyo: kami, dahil kami ang nagpaku kay Hesus sa krus!
Instik: aber, saan hardware kayo bili pako?
***********************************************************************************
Promoter: Misis, kapag pinaghalo ang breeze at tide, bubula kaya?
Misis: aba syempre!
Promoter: Mali!
Misis: Bakit naman?
Promoter: Dahil walang tubig.
***********************************************************************************
Nun riding a taxi.
Driver: I’d like to ask a favor if I may, sister. I have always fantasized kissing a nun.
Nun: OK. But first u have to be a catholic. Second, u hav 2 b single.
Driver: I am both catholic and single.
<>
Driver: thank you sister. But I must admit I lied 2 u. I am married and a muslim.
Nun: That’s OK. Im on my way to a costume party and my real name is Allan.
***********************************************************************************

ay! sister nga! malanjutay itech!

decayedFairytale* wrote:

[FM]No. 4 Pencil wrote:***********************************************************************************
Nagtalo ang mga hudyo at instik kung sino ang nauna sa mundo.
Hudyo: kami, dahil kami ang nagpaku kay Hesus sa krus!
Instik: aber, saan hardware kayo bili pako?
***********************************************************************************
Promoter: Misis, kapag pinaghalo ang breeze at tide, bubula kaya?
Misis: aba syempre!
Promoter: Mali!
Misis: Bakit naman?
Promoter: Dahil walang tubig.
***********************************************************************************
Nun riding a taxi.
Driver: I’d like to ask a favor if I may, sister. I have always fantasized kissing a nun.
Nun: OK. But first u have to be a catholic. Second, u hav 2 b single.
Driver: I am both catholic and single.
<>
Driver: thank you sister. But I must admit I lied 2 u. I am married and a muslim.
Nun: That’s OK. Im on my way to a costume party and my real name is Allan.
***********************************************************************************

ay! sister nga! malanjutay itech!

*bulging eyes*

what-the-heck!?!

anyway...

nyc!!


"may 3 joke akoh...

joke joke joke -- sir sy!.." ahhahaha

^^ wla lang..

gaya gaya?!

di naman...

i2 talgah, joke koh..

>> stwrdes: sir r u done?
passenger: no im joe...
stwrdes: i mean r u finished??
passenger: no, im a filipino.
stwrdes: i mean r u through?!
passenger: wat do u think of me fals?! oh common!!

^^

wow... gumaganun ang thread na ito!

The Exam

Si Pedro at Cardo after the exam.
Cardo: Perdo, nahirapan ka ba sa questions sa exam?
Pedro: Hindi!
Cardo: Ang galing mo naman!
Pedro: Nahirapan ako sa answers!

Spelling

Teacher: Miguel spell horse!
--Miguel: H....O....
Teacher: Bilisan mo
--Miguel: H....O....R...
Teacher: Sabing bilisan mo
--Miguel: Ya! Tigidig!!!Tigidig!!! Tigidig...

Speaking Japanese - Filipino/English to Japanese translations:

Manok - Sekken
Mamaya - Sakana
Joke - Biru
Stereo - Akai
Cook - Giza-giza
Ayos - Furo oke
Fingernail - Koko
Laughed - Anata-wa
This - Itto
Small piece of cloth - Retasu
Cornfield - Mais-san
Hindi Masyado - Natsu
Cigarette - Yoshi
Ipagpaumanhin - Kamisori
Is this your property? - Arimoto?
Yes, this is my property.- Arikoto.
Is this yours? - Sayobato?
This is mine. - Sakinitu.
Can I have it? - Akinato?
You can have it. - Sayonato.
Can we have it? - Saminato?
You can have it. - Sanyonato
You've grown so thin! - Kitanabutomo!
We saw each other. - Kitakami.
We had a big get-together. - Kitakitakami.
That was my assumption. - Inakarako.
We will boycott the election. - Kaminoboto.
Are you a victim of discrimination? - Minamatakaba?
I give up. - Sukonako.
Ouch! - Haraiku!
What a sad life it is. - Hainaku.
Is this your car? - Otomoto?
Is this my car? - Otokoto?
Is this your noodles? - Mikimoto?
I'll take this. - Kukuninkoto.
This is my desk. - Itodesko.
Speechless? - Wasabe?
An ampalaya (bittermelon) - Kurukurubot
What are your thoughts? - Kuru-kuromo?
I am thinking. - Munimuniko.
Are you playing the guitar? - Gigitaraka?
Is this your underwear? - Jakeemoto?
Are you annoyed already? - Iniskanabane?
You're crazy!!! - Sirauromo!!!

haha... korni yan!

•elias o.O'''• wrote:wow... gumaganun ang thread na ito!

The Exam

Si Pedro at Cardo after the exam.
Cardo: Perdo, nahirapan ka ba sa questions sa exam?
Pedro: Hindi!
Cardo: Ang galing mo naman!
Pedro: Nahirapan ako sa answers!

Spelling

Teacher: Miguel spell horse!
--Miguel: H....O....
Teacher: Bilisan mo
--Miguel: H....O....R...
Teacher: Sabing bilisan mo
--Miguel: Ya! Tigidig!!!Tigidig!!! Tigidig...

Speaking Japanese - Filipino/English to Japanese translations:

Manok - Sekken
Mamaya - Sakana
Joke - Biru
Stereo - Akai
Cook - Giza-giza
Ayos - Furo oke
Fingernail - Koko
Laughed - Anata-wa
This - Itto
Small piece of cloth - Retasu
Cornfield - Mais-san
Hindi Masyado - Natsu
Cigarette - Yoshi
Ipagpaumanhin - Kamisori
Is this your property? - Arimoto?
Yes, this is my property.- Arikoto.
Is this yours? - Sayobato?
This is mine. - Sakinitu.
Can I have it? - Akinato?
You can have it. - Sayonato.
Can we have it? - Saminato?
You can have it. - Sanyonato
You've grown so thin! - Kitanabutomo!
We saw each other. - Kitakami.
We had a big get-together. - Kitakitakami.
That was my assumption. - Inakarako.
We will boycott the election. - Kaminoboto.
Are you a victim of discrimination? - Minamatakaba?
I give up. - Sukonako.
Ouch! - Haraiku!
What a sad life it is. - Hainaku.
Is this your car? - Otomoto?
Is this my car? - Otokoto?
Is this your noodles? - Mikimoto?
I'll take this. - Kukuninkoto.
This is my desk. - Itodesko.
Speechless? - Wasabe?
An ampalaya (bittermelon) - Kurukurubot
What are your thoughts? - Kuru-kuromo?
I am thinking. - Munimuniko.
Are you playing the guitar? - Gigitaraka?
Is this your underwear? - Jakeemoto?
Are you annoyed already? - Iniskanabane?
You're crazy!!! - Sirauromo!!!

haha... korni yan!

^^haha.. nice giel..

wahaha..dami nyo alam!

next?

Manny: "napanood mo na ba yung toilet?"

Jinkee: "anung toilet?"

Manny: "yung may bampira"

XD wala lang.

aus ah..toilet^^

db c paqcuiao bida dun?

"noon, hindi lahat ng babae, maganda...

ngaun, hindi lahat ng maganda, babae..." -the best!

"noon, hindi lahat ng lalaki, gwapo...

ngaun, hindi lahat ng gwapo, lalaki..." -isa pa toh! (insan: "bakit yung mga gwapo ngaun puro bakla?!")